a million things we never said.

Its always hard to look into the eyes of someone who has hurt you. for the last few months i have felt like I had lost my very best friends. I felt I lost him through a complex situation filled with saturated drama. Left without closure, I sought after a happy ending, as usual. Today in the over-populated hall of my school, I approached you. humbling myself was so hard, because I know I did nothing wrong. I was always there for you, I was your best friend forever, and I thought you would return the favor. And yet, here I was, looking you in the eyes, hand on your arm.
"can we talk?" the words sounded unnatural, and so reluctant to come out.
"no." you say as I look at you with confusion, " I have to go to class."
"then later? please?" Almost half smiling, glad to have taken that first step and then your word in reply.
"no." you pulled your arm out from under my hand, and walked away with your head shaking. you walked away, leaving me with tears dropping to the ground like bombs of sadness, that only I could feel the explosion of. This was a new form of rejection I had not anticipated, expected to become acquainted with so soon.
Last night I had gone through all the different ways this situation could possibly go, how could I have skipped that one? How did I miss the one that actually, now, seemed so obvious? The one path taken, that I had not seen coming, and yet it still came. It hit me head on.
I just don't understand. I was the only one holding on? The only one who wanted our friendship back? So I guess this is goodbye?
I will miss you, and all the moments that we share. The talks we have had, the tears we have wiped away from each others eyes. You may push them away, stab them in hopes to make them disappear, but they will always be there, in the back of your mind. And every once in a long while they will creep up on you, and you will realize what you did, what you threw away. I hope you are happy where you are currently, because I am not going to try to change that anymore. I am now going to force myself to accept your rejection, I am going to "forget". "Forget" what I can't, and yet I am going to try. goodbye to you.

I know that this song is written from a guys perspective, but if you switch it, it really is the only song that can explain how I feel right now.

"Tomb" by Allred

I woke up such a mess today, so alone and so afraid
That all the mistakes I had made had followed me back to this place.
And all these fading memories, they still haunt me in my sleep.

Excuse me for the way I look at you. You remind me of someone I thought I knew.
And I loved her so, but she left me in this tomb.

Why does it always end this way, a million things we'd never say?
And if our hearts weren't meant to break, then why's there so much we can take?

Excuse me for the way I look at you. You remind me of someone I thought I knew.
And I loved her so, but she left me in this tomb.