I have been sick. Since 7th grade, I have been sick. Sick with what? A disease commonly known as depression. Whether triggered by events, or just being reborn, it always came back. For years, I didn’t do anything about it, didn’t show others, and didn’t want to change. I felt alone, abandoned, worthless, and attacked. I felt I had no purpose. And in a way, that was my purpose, my life, to feel that I was nothing. I tried to find happiness.
Unfortunately I was looking for it in the wrong places, which made it harder. After a life changing experience, and simply brilliant advice, I decided to make some changes in my life. I abruptly stopped communication with the friends that I had been hanging out with previously. They were going down a path that I knew would destroy what happiness I had left. So I was gone. It was so hard to leave them, but some friends that I had previous to this group took me right back. They showed me a whole different kind of friendship, one that wouldn’t stab you in the back. I felt so much better.
When I still didn’t feel happy with my new friends I tried to figure out what I could do to help myself further. I went to my savior, and gained the strongest testimony of the atonement I could possibly have. I realized what it was fully, not just on the surface. I prayed to him, and every time I did, I would feel such a peace in my heart that it would bring tears to my already watering eyes. Reading the scriptures every night before bed really helped me receive the inspiration that I needed for me, and those around me. I seemed to be more helpful to those I cared about most, and I had things in perspective that I didn’t understand before. I could feel a real change in myself taking place, and it was definitely for the better.
Finally the next thing that I incorporated into my life was writing. I wrote about every feeling, emotion, event, and inspiration I had. I wrote away all of my tears, and even some of my fears. When I wrote I c
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