How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.

Ever since I was a little girl, I have told myself I was going to marry a returned missionary (of my faith). I didn't completely understand at the time, I just grew up seeing missionaries leave, and come back so different, so wonderful. In the church that I am a member of (the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints) young women are asked -and recently- young men are almost commanded, to leave their homes for two years. During these two years, they devote everything they do to the Lord, and converting those who have not yet had the opportunity of coming to the gospel. It's a hard thing to do, and I will admit, I do not fully know and understand the pressure of the situation. To devote every word you say from the time you open your eyes in the morning to the time you close them at night, would be a definite challenge. Yet, young men go everyday, in hopes of becoming fully converted (themselves) to the gospel, hoping that they will touch those lives that only they were meant to touch, and hoping that all the things they are leaving behind, will be there when they get back.

Two years is a very long time, and can seem even longer when waiting for someone. It's like watching and waiting for the water to boil, in all reality you can pin down an approximate time that the water will always begin to boil, but when watching it, the time seems to slows to a crawl. Currently, I am dating a pre-missionary, one that I love, and would do anything for. I am so excited for him to have this experience, so excited for him to come even closer to God than he already is, and so excited for him to become even more the man I want to marry.

I will admit, that as a senior in high school, it's crazy to already feel like you have found the man you want to be with forever, but I know what I feel. If I was rushing and planning on getting married as soon as I graduated, that would be quite irrational, but this mission provides for me time to find myself, time for me to know, and time to help support him and show him how much I love him. I was thinking about it, and it would be very hard for me to wait for two years, I won't lie. BUT, the more I feel I love him, the easier it gets, and I know that when I go to college (wherever that may be) I can focus on my education. I can throw myself into absorbing all the knowledge I can, that can help better me, and my future.

Sometimes I feel that I am holding him back from fully wanting to go, but I think that in reality, it's his want and desire to KNOW before he goes that he will be diligent, that is his only hesitation, and of all the reasons to hesitate, I know this is one of the more righteous one. He is the most amazing kid, really. I have known him for a little over a year now, and truly the more that I came to know him, the more I realized what an amazing person he was, and could be.

You know those people that you look at, and you just SEE the potential they have? He is one of them. Not the ones that are class president, quarterback, and Mr. perfect GPA, no. I am talking about the one who doesn't have to try to show everyone who surrounds him he cares. I am talking about the one who has been through hell, not for himself, but for others, and has come out a better person then going in. I am talking about the one who knows what he wants to do because he knows he wants to save lives, and touch people in a significant way. I am talking about the one who is so wise, that sometimes I don't think he even sees it. He is the one I am talking about. You see he may look at himself, and say, I dont know how well I can do this, but I look at him and say, Dang, that is one kid who CAN do this, and much more. He has had trials, and if any person, who is listening to a missionary and is wanting to relate to someone, it will be him, an example of overcoming trials. If someone is going to be reached by a missionary, its most likely going to be the missionary who knows what its like to doubt, what its like to feel sad, over the missionary who has had his testimony handed to him his whole life, and hasn't made mistakes and felt the pain of the consequences. There is nothing wrong with either of these missionaries, in fact I applaud the parents who can truly convert their children, and keep them from the world, I am just saying that one is more likely to be of more influence.

There is so much in this world that we can choose to become, to do, and it is a worthy decision to go on a mission. For you future fathers out there, think about how you want to raise your kids. Do you want to raise them, knowing you have a steadfast testimony of this church, knowing that you have stories of times when you have brought other people to the gospel, knowing that you can help them handle anything that comes their way? I think that is the desire, but do we have the desire enough to act on it, and "just do it" (thanks nike). I don't know what exact purpose this post is serving, I just know that what I have said, I feel strongly about.

"Wait For Me" by Theory of a Deadman

You are not alone tonight
Imagine me there by your side
It's so hard to be here so far away from you
I'm counting the days till
I'm finally done
I'm counting them down, yeah, one by one
It feels like forever till I return to you
But it helps me on those lonely nights
It's that one thing that keeps me alive

[Chorus:]
Knowing that you wait for me
Ever so patiently

No one else knows the feeling inside
We hang up the phone without saying goodnight
Because it's the sound of your voice that brings me home
It's never been easy to say
But it's easier when I've gone away

[Chorus:]
Knowing that you wait for me
Ever so patiently
Yeah, you're everything I've ever dreamed of having and
It's everything I need from you just knowing that you wait for me

[Bridge:]
What I'd give
What I'd do
Knowing I'm not there for you
Makes it so hard to leave
What I'd give
What I'd do
Anything to get me home to you
And this time I'll stay

And you wait for me
Ever so patiently
Yeah, you're everything I've ever dreamed of having and
It's everything I need from you just knowing that you wait for me

what do you do to help? or not?

when i saw this photo, it touched me, i am not sure exactly why, but it did. You look at this man, and you wonder, what got him to this point? was it choices he made that led to this? or has he been this way his whole life? we can also look at this, and his sign and take it in a literal way, or we can take it as a metaphor for how we all feel at one point in our lives or another. we put up all the signs that we will take whatever help is given us. do we recieve what we need? rarely. so there is another point of view. we have those people that we KNOW need help, need a friend, someone to show a sliver of caring, and yet we would rather judge, walk away and claim its not your job to help. I do the same thing, even in a literal sense, when i walk past homeless people on the streets i feel so much empathy for them, so much sadness that i have taken for granted everything that i have, so i ignore them, even if i am spoken to. well, that changes today. it may not be much, but i never keep change with me, i hate it. but from now on i will collect all the change that i just accumilate, and when i see someone on the street, i will give it to them. it is probably not much, but at least its the thought, the willingness to out of my way to attempt to help, that makes all the difference. As much as money, these people need to know that people do care, that they are not all for nothing. you may say, "if you give the homeless money, you are just enabling them, because obviously, they got their because how they spend their money, AKA drugs. he could get a job" well even if that is the case, its not your place to take away the opportunity to let them make their own decisions. When you see someone in the halls, walking with their head down, do you think, "wow i should go talk to them" or do you instantly justify why you are too lazy to risk the awkwardnes with, "well its not like they try to talk to people, its thier fault, they are just sad all the time, theres nothing i can do". its wrong, and even i am guilty of this. but that doesnt mean we cant change. make an effort, it may not be easy or even in your comfort zone, but the good things in life we dont achieve because they are easy, we achieve them because we work hard for them. it may not change the world, or make a huge difference in any body elses life, but it will make a difference in yours, in what kind of person you are.

i get by with a little help from my friends

good friends are like stars, even though you dont see them, they are always there.

i love friends. i have many, and i hope to be one to many more. the one thing about me that i can say with a hint of pride, is that i am the friend to others that i want my friends to be to me. i can talk about anything and everything, or i can just listen when you need it.

recently i recieved a letter from a close friend. he has been away for quite a while (i think a two or three months). but before he left, it was so hard to be there for him, i felt helpless with the problems that he shared with me, and anytime i would try to hang out with him he would most likely blow me of for other things. i wasnt offended, i realized why he was doing the things he was doing, and why he felt the way he felt. nevertheless i couldnt give up on him, i love him, he is my friend, and i wanted to help in any way i could. when he left i cried, i miss him so much. i know its all for the better and i will see him in a bundle of months, but i still miss him, talking to him was always calming with his easy-going personality and advice.

anyway, in this letter he expressed his appreciation for me as a friend, and realized how much he regrets the things that he put before all the people in his life. in his leter i could feel the change that he has made, and even though he is still working to be happy again, i can see the happiness growing into his life again. i remember one night when i knew he needed me most, i made him brownies, and brought them over to his house, then i gave him a hug. its those moments that make a difference. it doesnt matter how much we hang out when everything is fine, it matters when i am there for him when he needs it the most. and thats when he would let me in most of the time, when he NEEDED it.
its amazing how we have best friends, and sometimes we forget how much we miss them until we see them, or talk to them again. i love my friends, and i have so many moments where i take them for granted, and then when i lose them, i feel a gaping whole in my life. i cant stand it. there are those friends that i have done nothing to make them leave, but they left anyway, there are those i pushed away, and then there are those i never intended to be friends with, and yet somehow they come into my life.

and my best friend of all? who is there for me whenever i need it, and even when i dont, trevin. i can tell him anything and he still sees the beauty in me, and i dont get it, and maybe i never will, but i appreciate it so much. i cant imagine ever losing my best friend. thats why i wont.

"With a little help from my friends" -- by the Beatles

What would you think if I sang out of tune,
Would you stand up and walk out on me.
Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song,
And I'll try not to sing out of key.
Oh I get by with a little help from my friends,
Mmm,I get high with a little help from my friends,
Mmm, I'm gonna try with a little help from my friends.

Do you need anybody?
I need somebody to love.
Could it be anybody?
I want somebody to love.

What do I do when my love is away.
(Does it worry you to be alone)
How do I feel by the end of the day
(Are you sad because you're on your own)
No, I get by with a little help from my friends,
Mmm, get high with a little help from my friends,
Mmm, gonna to try with a little help from my friends

Do you need anybody?
I need somebody to love.
Could it be anybody?
I want somebody to love.

Would you believe in a love at first sight?
Yes I'm certain that it happens all the time.
What do you see when you turn out the light?
I can't tell you, but I know it's mine.
Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends,
Mmm I get high with a little help from my friends,
Oh, I'm gonna try with a little help from my friends

Do you need anybody?
I just need someone to love.
Could it be anybody?
I want somebody to love

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends,
Mmm, gonna try with a little help from my friends
Ooh, I get high with a little help from my friends
Yes I get by with a little help from my friends,
with a little help from my friends

because it's yours.

i sit here, wearing this jacket, because its your jacket.
the soft material warms my skin and i think of you, because its yours.
the reminiscent scent of you in the fabric makes me smile, because its yours.
encircled in this jacket, a metaphor of your arms, because its yours.
the soothing comfort of this jacket, i love, because its yours.
your jacket is a symbol of your heart, because it is yours.
your jacket is a sad attempt to replace how you make me feel, because its yours, not you. Because it is yours, so am i.
i smile through my sadness because i am yours.
i feel beauty and potential because i am yours.
my heart beats on your off-beat because i am yours.
you inhabit almost every thought because i am yours.
i feel the strength i have and that i recieve from othres, because i am yours.
Because i am yours, you are mine :]

Oh Marshall...

"Have you ever loved someone so much, you'd give an arm for, not the expression, no, literally give an arm for? When they know theyre your heart, and you know you are their armor, and you will destroy anyone who would try to harm her. but what happens when carma, turns right around and bites you, and everything you stand for turns on you to spite you, what happens when you become the main source of her pain?"
-- "When I'm Gone" by eminem

I don't know exactly why I am writing this, or what it means, all I know is that this song came on on my i-pod, and it almost brought me to tears. I think that we all have that one person, or those few people in our lives that we love so much, we think too much, to ever hurt. And yet they are the ones we hurt the most. The mom you dissapoint, the friend you accidentally cross, the sibling you hurt with words that only you know will hurt the most. And when you hurt these people, it hurts you in turn, 10x worse. Seeing the sadness written across their face in whose handwriting? Yours, you even signed it with your beautiful John Hancock. How sad is that? Horribly, but its something that sometimes we can't control. As humans we do things, and don't even CONSIDER what consequences could come of it. But whats even worse is when you know EXACTLY what your consequences will be, and yet the decision is the hardest thing you will ever have to choose (at least so far in your life.)

The last post I wrote, was a quote, no words of my own, and maybe not even my thoughts, because I, myself, cant imaging letting go only to realize I am not wanted like I want this. I guess no one wants to know that, but right now, I know I am wanted, but the question, is it enough? Is it worth it to love whether you know you will be broken? I hope so, because I can't NOT love. Its not in my genetic makeup to not love. But it is in my makeup to hope, so much that my hope is all that keeps me holding on so tight. Keep going.

" If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be."

Alma 48 :17

I have the most amazing boyfriend. One that will bring me anything whenever i need it, one who loves me despite my flaws, one that puts me first even when I tell him not to, one who appreciates every singly smile that I make, every yawn i take, and every expectation that i break. He is the one that makes me feel beautiful in all i am, in all i have become. He is the one that strengthens me enough to overcome sadness, enough to overcome trials, and to truly see my potential. He is the one that is so selfless, and cares genuinely for every "paper cut" that i receive. Every night I thank my God for blessing me with a best friend who will listen to me, who can talk as deeply as I want, who makes me want to perfect myself so that I can be good enough for him. Every night I pray for my best friend, that he will be happy, that i will make the right decisions, that i will help him reach his full potential. He is the one that has so much empathy, he can relate and connect with anyone that he wants to, and he has gone through enough to be able to relate to most sadness's. He is the one that even if he doesn't fully understand, he will try his best. He is the one that lets me laugh about nothing and he will just sit and watch, engagingly absorbing my mood. He is the one that I love so much, that I don't fear being broken, even though it is a wide possibility. He is the one. "Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength; loving someone deeply gives you courage." The one that gives me courage, and strength. I hope I can do the same for him.

"When I see your smile
Tears run down my face
I can't replace
And now that I'm stronger I've figured out

How this world turns cold
And breaks through my soul
And I know, I'll find deep inside me
I can be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven

It's okay, it's okay, it's okay

Seasons are changing and waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you, I'll be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven

'Cause you're my, you're my, my
My true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away

'Cause I'm here for you
Please don't walk away
And please tell me, you'll stay, stay

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know, I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever" --"Your Guardian Angel" by the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

'nuff said

+

I would rather drown in deep water, than shallow water.

What is life worth if we take no risks? I look around me, and see so many people that are looking at the next "anti-aging face lotion" or the next plastic surgery, and it makes me sick. When did our world become so shallow? Where is the risk in looking like every other teeny-bopper wannabe mom? There isn't one. Where is the risk in bleaching your hair like all the cheerleaders in hope to attract the same attention? Its not there either. I have been guilty of some of these things, trying to buy clothes to fit in, listening to music that seems to be the "right" kind to everyone else, but me, loathing my body, because it wasnt like... well hers. Then I started to realize that I cant change everything about me, and why should I want to. Why not take the one thing that seperates us as humans, and make the world see how beautiful that is? The two things that make us different than everyone else, is ours physical features, and our thoughts/actions.

Why not enhance the features that we have? We all have beautiful features. You can look at any person for a moment in passing and see an ugly, undesirable human being. But if you got to look up close, maybe you would see gorgeously high cheekbones, or captivating eyes that light up when they smile, or perfect teeth. It is my theory that there is always at least ONE thing that makes each person beautiful. I may not love everything about myself but I can see my beauty through my eyes.

Now, I have been only talking about the skin deep risks, but thats only part of what I see as a problem. I have a question for you guys out there: Is it really attractive to see a girl that acts too stupid to spell her own name? And for the girls: Is it cute to see a guy that treats people like he doesn't care, because he is "too cool"? I think the answers to these questions are fairly obvious, but maybe its not since not many others seems to see it. None of us are ditz's at heart. And ALL of us care, we care a lot, almost too much for our own good. So why not take the risk of showing what you are really thinking, what you are really feeling? Why not share the amazingly complex thought that just popped into your head? I may not be the most DEEP person on the earth, but its really lonely sometimes to feel like I am the only who thinks about things, who acknowlegdes the bad in things without being too pessimistic. If we all put our thoughts out there like we felt like the world needed to hear them, maybe people would listen.

But we are afraid. It always seems to go back to that doesn't it. Well here is one thing that I will say, and its easier said than done, but I did it, so it cant be TOO difficult. If you are afraid to show the people your best friends what you are thinking, how you are truly feeling, who you REALLY are, then leave, find new friends. What is the point in being there if you really don't fit in? If you are scared of persecution from your friends, then what makes them friends? Just leave. There are always other friends to be had. And as I found, they were sitting there waiting for me, waiting for me to realize I can do better.
I used to be afraid. And then I realized how strong I was, how strong every human is. I can take anything high school passes my way. I would rather put myself out there, and be attacked and killed for my depth and personality, than slowly drown in the self-loathing in the shallow depths of a kiddie pool. Its a hard thing, to seperate yourself from what the media seems to be forcing on us, but its not impossible. Take a risk.

Oh the things we learnnnn.....

Today, I resolved a key issue in my life, one that I had caused. We all do things in the moment, things that we know we will regret. And a week or two ago, I followed this pattern to a tee. As much as this embarrasses me, and makes me look lesser in some of your eyes, I hurt someone. Not someone close to me, someone I actually don’t like very much. I had a genuine “mean girl” moment. In passing this person in the all I coughed an undesirable name in her direction. Immature, I know. For the first minute afterwards, it almost felt good to get my opinion out in the open. Unfortunately soon after that I began to feel regret. And even sooner after that the consequences followed. Some unhappy aftermath crashed into me and hurt me probably just as much as I hurt her. Quickly, I realized that I needed to fix the problem. So today I walked right up to her and apologized. She gracefully accepted and things seem to be fine between us. I feel like a burden is lifted, like I don’t have to worry or feel bad anymore.
I also had an epiphany or two today, not happy ones. More of the kind that you remember something that you wished you could just forget? Yeah, those. Life is hard, but I can do this right? Everyone can. Anyway, this is probably my most casual post. I don’t like it, but I wanted to at least let you know that I did the right thing. After of course doing the wrong thing, but still

Shake the Dust.

I found this poem that I really loved the format of, and its performance is even more amazing then the way it is written in merely words alone. Go to http://www.wattpad.com/392468-shake-the-dust-by-anis-mojgani and see it for yourself. I am not the brilliant mastermind behind this piece, not this time. Here goes nothing:

SHAKE THE DUST-

This is for the babies,
for the minimum wage workers of the unions,
for the dogs neglected,
SHAKE THE DUST.
this is for the unreached people,
for the dancers,and the walkers,
for the shy girl who sits alone at lunch observing the peers around her,
Live every moment as if you had lived it so many times it has been perfected into its purest form.
SHAKE THE DUST.
this is for you, mom.
for upcoming musicians,
and for the underpaid electricians.
for the muscular men,
for the strong men that out-do the muscular ones.
this is for the graveyard shift mom who just wants to be home with her kids.
for her boss that employs her.
for the lovers
for the soldiers fearing for their lives every extra second of life they get.
SHAKE THE DUST.
This is for the youngest child,
for the rebellious,
for the inspiring teachers of life,
SHAKE THE DUST.
Learn from those before you, the mistakes you see magnified, learn from the prints in the pavement, compare them to the real thing now.
This is for you,
for me,
this is for the nerds no one recognizes behind the computer screen,
for the lives unlived.
SHAKE THE DUST.
This is for the killers
for the tears shed by those loved ones of the life you took
for the fathers
SHAKE THE DUST.
Listen, hear the words of those who come before you, listen to the emotions behind the lyrics, and listen for the deeper meaning in everything.
This is for the politicians
for the comedians that make light of all thats possible
for the drug users and abusers
SHAKE THE DUST.
Change your lives, the things you know are in need of changing, the things that hurt others, because you know what you do effects everyone around you.
This is for the male nurses,
for the ill,
for the boys told 'be a man, stop crying',
SHAKE THE DUST.
Cry, because you know its okay, because you know something is wrong, cry because you are the minority, cry, because you can.
This is for the 9/11 terrorists
for the firefighters that get cats out of trees,
for the branches of family trees that seem to be burning and crashing down,
for the underdogs,
for the akons of the world, because we put the blame one them
SHAKE THE DUST.
This is for us.

"What a beautiful smile, can it stay for a while? On this beautiful night, We'll make everything right."

Many things have been going on these last few days, maybe even weeks. The same thought, the same decision that we both fear has been at the back of our minds for a long time. And all I can think about is the pain that comes with that thougth. What I havent been thinking about is the fact that it doesnt HAVE to be sad, I cant assume I know what is to happen. Because I dont. It could go my way. But in any case. What right do I have to waste the time that I know I have left, fearing what could be?
I dont. What I now realize is that I need to realize that I can make everything right. There is always a way. And with this, I want to make sure that I find it. I love you too much not too. I wont just let go, not this time, not with you.
You are the one thing that is keeping me so happy and fully content with my life. The one thing that makes me look forward to the next day. The one man in my life I feel I can trust with my life (other than my dad). You are the one thing I REFUSE to lose. I love you.

"Beautiful Love" by the Afters

Far away, I feel your beating heart
All alone, beneath the crystal stars
Staring into space, what a lonely face
I'll try to find my place with you

[chorus]
What a beautiful smile
Can I stay for awhile?
On this beautiful night
We'll make everything right
My beautiful love, my beautiful love

Larger than the moon, my love for you
Worlds collide as heaven pulls us through
The secret of the world is written in the stars
I'm carrying your heart in mine

[chorus]
What a beautiful smile
Can I stay for awhile?
On this beautiful night
We'll make everything right
My beautiful love

Maybe a greater thing will happen
Maybe all will see
Maybe our love will catch like fire
As it burns through me
[3x]

[chorus]

What a beautiful smile
Can I stay for awhile?
On this beautiful night
We'll make everything right
[2x]

My beautiful love
La la la la love
La la la la love

My beautiful
La la la la love
La la la la love

My beautiful love

decisions, decisions....

i miss you so much,
you say your still here,
but you aren't
i feel so alone now.

we talk and continue to talk,
nothing seems to change
i stay the same,
and you do too,
the thick air around us only grows
thicker.

chose me, pick me,
we could do this together,
i dont have to go
i could help you, but
i dont think you want it.

i love you so much
you are what i want most
why is this happening
and what i the outcome?
its up to you.

"I thought I could Fly, I'm stuck on the Ground, so why do I try, I know I'm Gonna Fall Down"

Fear is allowing the thought of what could happen control our thoughts. Thus, allowing our imagination to run away with it. Fear is the reason so much ISN'T, why so much doesnt take place. We don't stand close to the edge of the cliff for fear of falling, and yet in doing so we miss the spectacular views from above. We are reluctant to trust and give our hearts to those we love, for fear that those who hold it will break it, thus breaking us. But in doing so we waste time, and the feeling of being able to share our lives, and trust others. I can't comprehend my potential although it has been told to me many times, for fear that i may not live up to it, that i will fail. I am scared. I am scared to let go of someone, i dont want to, and i dont plan to. but i keep telling myself that i have to. I am scared to say goodbye, for fear that i wont mean it, that i couldnt do it.

Down by Jason Walker

"I don’t know where I’m at
I’m standing at the back
And I’m tired of waiting
Waiting here in line,
hoping that I’ll find what I’ve been chasing.
I shot for the sky
I’m stuck on the ground
So why do I try, I know I’m gonna to fall down
I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?
Never know why it’s coming down, down, down.
Not ready to let go
Cause then I'd never know
What I could be missing
But I’m missing way too much
So when do I give up what I’ve been wishing for.
I shot for the sky
I’m stuck on the ground
So why do I try, I know I’m gonna to fall down
I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?
Never know why it’s coming down, down, down.
Oh I am going down, down, down
Can’t find another way around
And I don’t want to hear the sound, of losing what I never found.
I shot for the sky
I’m stuck on the ground
So why do I try, I know I’m gonna to fall down
I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?
I never know why it’s coming down, down, down.
I shot for the sky
I’m stuck on the ground
So why do I try, I know I’m gonna to fall down
I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?
Oh it’s coming down, down, down."

I'm Scared.

We leave our fingerprints wherever we go, and whatever we do, leaves its prints on us.

Have you ever looked at your father’s hands? If you haven’t, I strongly advise it. What you find may demand respect, rather than ask for it. The calluses, the scars, the wearing down that has taken place, it all tells a story. Maybe his job, maybe hard work in the service of others, from the military, to using his priesthood to heal the weak, who knows? You could.
I know it is no coincidence that the hands are such a key part to all we do, that they are so unique. Not one person has the same hands, the same fingerprints. Everyone uses their hands for different purposes. Its up to us whether that purpose is right or wrong. We leave our fingerprints wherever we go, and whatever we do leaves its prints on us.
The ULTIMATE example of this would be the Savior. Jesus Christ. His hands served as many people as he met, wiped away as many tears as he saw. His hands influenced even those outside those who knew him personally on this earth, all of us. If you don’t believe that Christ is our Savior, the point is still valid that all he did with his hands were selfless, and in service of others. And in the end, his hands showed as proof of his sacrifice for mankind, for you, for me. The marks on his hands symbolize pain that no human being could physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, go through by himself. More than any of us could tolerate.
As of right now, my hands are fairly scratch less, fairly “new”. I hope to change that through serving those around me, through achieving happiness for my future family, though hard work and perseverance. I hope to command respect with my hands one day, just like our fathers and mothers today.

"His Hands" by Kenneth Cope

His hands,

Tools of creation,

Stronger than nations,

Power without end

And yet through them we find out truest friend

His hands

Sermons of kindness

Healing men’s blindness

Halting years of pain

Children waiting to be held again

His hands would serve his whole life though

Showing man what hands might do

Giving, ever giving, endlessly

Each day was filled with selflessness

Ands ill not rest until I make up my hands what they could be

‘til these hands become like those from galilee

his hands

lifting a leper

warming a beggar

calling back the dead

breaking bread, five thousand fed

his hands

hushing contention

pointing to heaven

ever free of sin

then bidding man to follow him

His hands would serve his whole life though

Showing man what hands might do

Giving, ever giving, endlessly

Each day was filled with selflessness

Ands ill not rest until I make up my hands what they could be

‘til these hands become like those from galilee

His hands

Clasped in agony

As he lay pleading, bleeding in the garden

While just moments away

Other hands betray him

Out of greed, shameful greed

And then his hands

Are trembling

Straining to carry the beam that they’ve been led to

As he stumbles through the streets

Heading towards the hill on which he died

He would die

They take his hands, his mighty hands, those gentle hands

And then they pierce them, they pierce them

He lets them, because of love

From birth to death was selflessness

And clearly now I see him with his hands

Calling to me

And though I’m not yet as I would be

He has shown me how I could be

I will make my hands like those from Galilee